I am getting a new apartment in Los Angeles this weekend, actually, hopefully, ideally, renting a room in a house that rents out all of the rooms to individual tenants- and USC grad students only if everything goes according to plan.
But the age-old question of location, location, location had me thinking- how far is too far? Points A and B being your place of residence and your consistent destination- work, school, your kid's school, your place of worship, your favorite protesting spot, whatever.
For some of you who know me, I have lived in 11, soon to be 12 places in 26 years. And for the most part my family and I have selected our dwellings within reasonable proximity to our locations that we would frequent often i.e. work, school, and church. When I say reasonable proximity I mean about 15-20 minutes. We never lived in any big, big cities, so traveling times were pretty consistent, with weather being the only variable- black ice? add at least 5 minutes for safety.
It threw us for a loop when we moved to Connecticut and people lived in different towns, but knew each other as if they were in the same zip code. Like I said, we lived in small towns and yes people from Wausau knew people from Merrill, but they went to different churches, their kids to different schools, etc., To live in Avon, but to go to church in Canton was very strange to us. The Connecticut way of life still remains very strange to me. I'm surprised no one has spontaneously combusted yet.
When I moved to Chicago on my own it took me a good hour to get to work via public transportation- bus + the Red line, not counting delays due to linework, which was a constant in the summer of 2006.
Sometimes I took my car, but during the holidays working retail in Lincoln Park made it impossible to find a spot for my car, so I relied on the ease of the public transportation. And when my car was damaged beyond repair my prior experience using public transportation made the journey less of a hassle and more of just a part of my going-to-work routine.
When I moved to the suburb of Naperville I chose an apartment whose location was only ten minutes driving time away, but unfortunately was not located on a road that was safe enough to get to on foot.
Now it takes me about half an hour (on foot) to get to my current job. Some people are horrified when I tell them how long it takes and more than three people have offered to pick me up on their way to work. But my walk not only gives me exercise, it also gives me a chance to wake up and really immerse myself in my surroundings.
But my latest relocation had me thinking. The champions of New Urbanism argue that our auto-dependent society has allowed people to live farther from their jobs- not necessarily a bad thing at the end of the day- but not great for the environment either when you consider how many emissions and pollutions one can accrue over simply a five-day work week when mass transit is possible.
Note I didn't say plausible as many people in the suburbs can attest to- I don't even want to know how few suburbs even have a bus line running through or within reasonable walking distance of the major sub-divisions.
Unlike say, Chicago (how I love their transportation department!) where one is hard pressed to find a major neighborhood that is not near some form of public transportation. And New York? Fugghedaboudit! In one ill-planned trip I managed to get from Wall Street to the West Side to midtown with the help of the NY subway system and my own dogged determination.
We have family friends who live up in the Bay Area and the father commutes two hours-each way! each day to get to his job. This is beyond crazy to me. Yes, I understand the need to have your kids be in "good schools," "safe neighborhoods," etc., But Dad has to schlep two hours each way each day? Oi. . . This is not uncommon for people in the Bay Area- my housemate's dad, when he (my housemate) was growing up- would ride his motorcycle- come rain or shine between the lanes of stalled cars (think the opening scene from Office Space)- two hours to get to his job.
I have no doubt that this is true for families across the country, especially in bigger, non-mass-transit oriented cities, especially in the South like Atlanta and Charlotte. But I think that it is a time for a revolution.
Hopefully as part of the "green" movement more funding will be devoted to mass transit, and innovative forms of it- light rail, anyone? And two hour one-way commutes will become a thing of the past. Here's hoping.
Friday, June 19, 2009
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Stop the Cow Farts! with Garlic?
Forgive the crudity, but for those of you who don't know part of our greenhouse gas problem stems from bovine flatulence. Yep, cow farts contain methane, which is contributing to our steadily rising temperature.
I like Alan Richman's solution "the way I see it is to eat more meat" -from his work Fork It Over
However, in the newest issue of Scientific American 3.0 (Volume 19, Number 2) some entrepreneuring Welsh people have come up with a solution- garlic. Neem Biotech in Cardiff, Wales is making a product called "Mootral" (moo + neutral), which contains an extract in garlic called "allicin." When cows (and sheep) are given this product the bacteriat that produces the methane is inhibited. How much? Two small trials have been conducted showng a reduction by 15% More research hopes to be able to increase the reduction success rate.
I still plan to do my part by dining at steakhouses everywhere, but it's nice to now that science is making strides that don't involve my cholesterol.
I like Alan Richman's solution "the way I see it is to eat more meat" -from his work Fork It Over
However, in the newest issue of Scientific American 3.0 (Volume 19, Number 2) some entrepreneuring Welsh people have come up with a solution- garlic. Neem Biotech in Cardiff, Wales is making a product called "Mootral" (moo + neutral), which contains an extract in garlic called "allicin." When cows (and sheep) are given this product the bacteriat that produces the methane is inhibited. How much? Two small trials have been conducted showng a reduction by 15% More research hopes to be able to increase the reduction success rate.
I still plan to do my part by dining at steakhouses everywhere, but it's nice to now that science is making strides that don't involve my cholesterol.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
More Views From the Road
This afternoon my dog Dante and I went to the vet and acquired some antibiotics for a condition of his. I read the label and realized that one of his meds need to be taken with food. And what kind of delicacy does Mr. Dante favor? Peanut butter! What we were out of? Peanut butter! This necessitated a trip to the "local" grocery store, which may not be around the corner, as Elizabeth Plater-Zyberk and Andres Duany hope in all cities with an implementation of a new urbanist design scheme, but it was within (relative) walking distance.
Walking back from the store I came to an intersection where two perhaps eleven (-?) year old boys were waiting for the light to change.
I could tell that they had just returned from an afternoon excursion to Roller Town, the local skating rink and arcade, where I spent many a middle school afternoon, as they both clutched small treasures.
We were apparently heading in the same direction, so I had a chance to observe them from a discrete distance.
They were about the same size and height, but appearance-wise they embodied the polar extremes of that caterpillar-like stage of a young man's life when he is no longer truly a child, but he is not quite a teenager. One had long, tousled blonde hair and the other was dark haired, which was cut in something a quarter of an inch from a buzz cut.
Both were wearing those ill-fitting, but totally age-appropriate clothes for their age- you know what I mean- those slightly over-sized t-shirts and average fitting pants. Pants not nearly as baggy as those favored by gangsta rappers and their suburban fans that were sported a decade (yikes) ago nor the gonad-crushing skintight almost leggings i.e. "skinny jeans" that the teenagers of today are sporting. Yes, I am old when I cast a critical eye on the fashions and trends of today with a jaundiced eye. Yet somehow I still can't comprehend how pants that double as a tourniquet to the lower extremities are "cool," but this clearly my age talking.
I remember when my brother favored t-shirts that looked like he'd raided my dad's closet and shorts that looked more like baggy pants cut to calf-length. Then he suddenly discovered American Eagle and Hot Topic and started sporting more body-conscious outfits. The sudden enlightening of the concept of girls and the desire for proximity to them was also a contributing factor to this revolution of the wardrobe. I am not immune to fashion faux pases. In fact, I think everything up to yesterday has been a mistake I'd prefer to forget and not to captured for posterity on film.
To remain unobtrusive I kept my earbuds in and my ipod on to Chester French's "Love the Future" album. Therefore, I'm not exactly sure what they were talking about, but I know that one was quite elated by his prize, a sort of plastic stick with a grabbing mechanism on the end, which he took great delight in using to hit his friend with, when said friend was not looking.
There are several intersections from the point where we first came upon one another to my final destination and rather than wait for the light to change they sprinted across the street after judging oncoming traffic to be at a safe enough distance. They also lept to swat at low hanging tree branches and broke into a sort of inspired sprint several times too, oblivious to how odd this may look.
It is moments like these that I savor, moments that remind me of my own (what feels like distant) past and what it really means to be young and alive. There is much that lies ahead of these two boys, but for these embodiments of the future, the present is all that matters. And honestly, it is all that should matter to us too.
I would have missed out on this quiet observation if I had been driving. If anything, I probably would have regarded the boys as a minor irritation- two more additional factors that I would have to calculate in my defensive driving formula. Would one of them suddenly run into the road, would one of them suddenly trip and fall into my path, etc.,? Instead of what they are, two boys enjoying a warm spring day, free of their parents' watchful eye, and exploring the world on their own terms, something every child deserves.
As graduation draws near for schools near and far I also become quite philosophical about life, especially my own, and the direction that it is taking, should be taking, or veered off course. It is an annual thing, though when it started exactly I am not sure.
So, some future postings may be waxing philosophic about what it means to inhabit this mortal coil. But I am also compiling some thoughts about new urbanism, sustainability, and reviews of the excellent spring 2009 issue of Good magazine (http://www.good.is/) and Scientific American 3.0
Wishing you a safe and satisfying summer.
Walking back from the store I came to an intersection where two perhaps eleven (-?) year old boys were waiting for the light to change.
I could tell that they had just returned from an afternoon excursion to Roller Town, the local skating rink and arcade, where I spent many a middle school afternoon, as they both clutched small treasures.
We were apparently heading in the same direction, so I had a chance to observe them from a discrete distance.
They were about the same size and height, but appearance-wise they embodied the polar extremes of that caterpillar-like stage of a young man's life when he is no longer truly a child, but he is not quite a teenager. One had long, tousled blonde hair and the other was dark haired, which was cut in something a quarter of an inch from a buzz cut.
Both were wearing those ill-fitting, but totally age-appropriate clothes for their age- you know what I mean- those slightly over-sized t-shirts and average fitting pants. Pants not nearly as baggy as those favored by gangsta rappers and their suburban fans that were sported a decade (yikes) ago nor the gonad-crushing skintight almost leggings i.e. "skinny jeans" that the teenagers of today are sporting. Yes, I am old when I cast a critical eye on the fashions and trends of today with a jaundiced eye. Yet somehow I still can't comprehend how pants that double as a tourniquet to the lower extremities are "cool," but this clearly my age talking.
I remember when my brother favored t-shirts that looked like he'd raided my dad's closet and shorts that looked more like baggy pants cut to calf-length. Then he suddenly discovered American Eagle and Hot Topic and started sporting more body-conscious outfits. The sudden enlightening of the concept of girls and the desire for proximity to them was also a contributing factor to this revolution of the wardrobe. I am not immune to fashion faux pases. In fact, I think everything up to yesterday has been a mistake I'd prefer to forget and not to captured for posterity on film.
To remain unobtrusive I kept my earbuds in and my ipod on to Chester French's "Love the Future" album. Therefore, I'm not exactly sure what they were talking about, but I know that one was quite elated by his prize, a sort of plastic stick with a grabbing mechanism on the end, which he took great delight in using to hit his friend with, when said friend was not looking.
There are several intersections from the point where we first came upon one another to my final destination and rather than wait for the light to change they sprinted across the street after judging oncoming traffic to be at a safe enough distance. They also lept to swat at low hanging tree branches and broke into a sort of inspired sprint several times too, oblivious to how odd this may look.
It is moments like these that I savor, moments that remind me of my own (what feels like distant) past and what it really means to be young and alive. There is much that lies ahead of these two boys, but for these embodiments of the future, the present is all that matters. And honestly, it is all that should matter to us too.
I would have missed out on this quiet observation if I had been driving. If anything, I probably would have regarded the boys as a minor irritation- two more additional factors that I would have to calculate in my defensive driving formula. Would one of them suddenly run into the road, would one of them suddenly trip and fall into my path, etc.,? Instead of what they are, two boys enjoying a warm spring day, free of their parents' watchful eye, and exploring the world on their own terms, something every child deserves.
As graduation draws near for schools near and far I also become quite philosophical about life, especially my own, and the direction that it is taking, should be taking, or veered off course. It is an annual thing, though when it started exactly I am not sure.
So, some future postings may be waxing philosophic about what it means to inhabit this mortal coil. But I am also compiling some thoughts about new urbanism, sustainability, and reviews of the excellent spring 2009 issue of Good magazine (http://www.good.is/) and Scientific American 3.0
Wishing you a safe and satisfying summer.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Inglorious Bastard: a Few Thoughts on a Mr. Bernie Madoff
I love a Quentin Tarantino movie as much as the next person, but this is not a review of his upcoming film.
This is just a small rumination on Bernie Madoff. I did, however, look up the word inglorious, to make sure that I was using it correctly. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, Third edition, inglorious is an adjective 1. ignominious; disgraceful, 2. not famous or renowned
As we still endure the tremors of the global economic meltdown, one man holds a lot of the blame, Mr. Bernie Madoff.
Madoff, I am not going to do him the courtesy of a title, has pled guilty and is looking at 150 years in jail. Yet the on-going mystery is where is the money?
I know how to make $50 disappear- hello Barnes and Noble! But hundreds of millions- and not just the funds he kept recycling over and over in his Ponzi scheme- where did they go!?
Vanity Fair has written an exclusive article called, "Madoff's World" by a Mr. Mark Seal and Fortune magazine has recently published a special report entitled, "How Bernie Did It" by Mr. James Bandler and Mr. Nicholas Varchaver with Ms. Doris Burke
The old adage of keeping your friends closer and your enemies closer may not be as true as we once thought, perhaps it is with friends like Madoff, who needs enemies?
My thoughts and prayers, small as they may be, are with all of those who Madoff wronged.
This is just a small rumination on Bernie Madoff. I did, however, look up the word inglorious, to make sure that I was using it correctly. According to the American Heritage Dictionary, Third edition, inglorious is an adjective 1. ignominious; disgraceful, 2. not famous or renowned
As we still endure the tremors of the global economic meltdown, one man holds a lot of the blame, Mr. Bernie Madoff.
Madoff, I am not going to do him the courtesy of a title, has pled guilty and is looking at 150 years in jail. Yet the on-going mystery is where is the money?
I know how to make $50 disappear- hello Barnes and Noble! But hundreds of millions- and not just the funds he kept recycling over and over in his Ponzi scheme- where did they go!?
Vanity Fair has written an exclusive article called, "Madoff's World" by a Mr. Mark Seal and Fortune magazine has recently published a special report entitled, "How Bernie Did It" by Mr. James Bandler and Mr. Nicholas Varchaver with Ms. Doris Burke
The old adage of keeping your friends closer and your enemies closer may not be as true as we once thought, perhaps it is with friends like Madoff, who needs enemies?
My thoughts and prayers, small as they may be, are with all of those who Madoff wronged.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Something's Innovative in the State of Denmark!
OK, OK I know Denmark is not a state. It's a country, the ancestral home of my mom, etc., You want more details? I have enclosed Wikipedia's page on the country that does more than share its name with a breakfast pastry, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denmark
But permit me an esoteric reference to the Bard without involving a lesson in geography.
The reason I am writing about Denmark is that I came across a really interesting article about how incredibly "green" Denmark is. I don't mean green like how Iceland is really green and Greenland is really, really icey, but in the environmental sense of the word.
There was a good article in the March 16, 2009 edition of TIME magazine entitled, "the Gutsy Superpower. How Denmark's green energy initiatives power its economy" by Bryan Walsh http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1881646,00.html#
I used to think that TIME magazine was kind of old and stogy, but they've had such good articles (of personal interest) lately that I'm seriously getting a subscription. Either that or I'm getting old. Eh.
Anyway, I've always considered the Danes honest, hardworking folk who don't seem to get all uppity over anything or demand more than their fair share of the global pie. I knew that my mom's family is from there and that's about all I knew.
However, I found out that Denmark is the world's leader in wind power. According to Wikipedia it is the 10th greenest country in the world, which is also good. Denmark is also home of Vestas, a manufacturer that has become the top producer of turbines.
This didn't just happen due to good luck and great timing. The Danish government made a commitment to producing and improving their wind power technology, including involving the utility companies to "purchase wind energy at a preferential price- thus guaranteeing a customer base." (-Bryan Walsh, "the Gusty Superpower,"TIME, March 16, 2009, 42-43) Like Field of Dreams, "if you build it, they will come."
This was due, mainly from the 1973 oil crisis. Denmark relied on petroleum, almost all of it imported. Sound familiar? Realizing that they were causing their own problems, they set about to fix it before it happened again. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. . .
We could stand to take a lesson from their book. I know that President Obama is super busy right about now, but this is why great leaders delegate! No time like the present, so let's learn from our friends who don't hate us.
But permit me an esoteric reference to the Bard without involving a lesson in geography.
The reason I am writing about Denmark is that I came across a really interesting article about how incredibly "green" Denmark is. I don't mean green like how Iceland is really green and Greenland is really, really icey, but in the environmental sense of the word.
There was a good article in the March 16, 2009 edition of TIME magazine entitled, "the Gutsy Superpower. How Denmark's green energy initiatives power its economy" by Bryan Walsh http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1881646,00.html#
I used to think that TIME magazine was kind of old and stogy, but they've had such good articles (of personal interest) lately that I'm seriously getting a subscription. Either that or I'm getting old. Eh.
Anyway, I've always considered the Danes honest, hardworking folk who don't seem to get all uppity over anything or demand more than their fair share of the global pie. I knew that my mom's family is from there and that's about all I knew.
However, I found out that Denmark is the world's leader in wind power. According to Wikipedia it is the 10th greenest country in the world, which is also good. Denmark is also home of Vestas, a manufacturer that has become the top producer of turbines.
This didn't just happen due to good luck and great timing. The Danish government made a commitment to producing and improving their wind power technology, including involving the utility companies to "purchase wind energy at a preferential price- thus guaranteeing a customer base." (-Bryan Walsh, "the Gusty Superpower,"TIME, March 16, 2009, 42-43) Like Field of Dreams, "if you build it, they will come."
This was due, mainly from the 1973 oil crisis. Denmark relied on petroleum, almost all of it imported. Sound familiar? Realizing that they were causing their own problems, they set about to fix it before it happened again. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. . .
We could stand to take a lesson from their book. I know that President Obama is super busy right about now, but this is why great leaders delegate! No time like the present, so let's learn from our friends who don't hate us.
the New Venice?
I realized that April is almost over, and I only have one posting credited to the month of showers and spring flowers.
I attribute it to my mattress that is trying to kill me, rendering me with excruciating back pain (between the shoulder blades no less) that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, if I had enemies. I say a life well lived is the best revenge.
Therefore, I decided to post a little something something so that come fall when I am at USC (yay my #1 choice !!!) people won't think that I'm a pretentious idiot who just says that she has a blog, which she hasn't touched since 2007- that's my other blog- youneedaninja.blogspot.com, which has, like 3 recipes on it and that's about it. I don't even remember which e-mail it's tied to.
I have been thinking a lot about this whole economy (and how we got here), new urbanism, and Detroit, all of which will merit their own postings. But I had to share this bizarre concept that I discovered in an article from Wired's February 2009 issue called, "Live Free or Drown"
http://www.wired.com/techbiz/startups/magazine/17-02/mf_seasteading
There is an entrepreneur named Patri Friedman who is the executive director of a non-profit called, the Seasteading Institute. The Seasteading Institute has big plans to start a new society on water. Yes, water. Mr. Friedman is a former software engineer who worked for Google, but wanted to pursue something much bigger. (in full disclosure I do process some health insurance claims at my current position for Google) Mr. Friedman is also the son of libertarian legal theorist David Friedman and grandson of free-market economist Milton Friedman, who won the Nobel Prize (facts from Chris Baker's article)
I'll spare you the political ideology behind this idea. Suffice to say it'll be both laissez-faire (let do, literally > let things take their natural course) and laissez bon temps roule (let the good times roll)
Wired covered this story, not only because it's unusual, but also because the concept is supposed to be like a platform in the same sense that Linux is a platform, which can expand and build upon itself. This is definitely out of my depth, but the author of the article, Chris Baker, does an excellent job explaining it. If you know anyone who's a tech nerd/sociologist this may intrigue them.
My dad, though I love him dearly, sometimes entertains rather "unusual" thoughts about separating from the government, libertarian ideals, etc., But this concept takes the cake, past the people in Montana who want to succeed from the U.S. (good luck with that. . .), past the hermits and the recluses, even the Unabomber seems "normal" to a relative degree. These people and their motivations are interesting, no doubt about it, but they are seriously out there, both literally and figuratively.
I did think, however, that though there is technically a definite absence of any need for planners- what will they need people to help plan make sure that the world's first floating Wal-mart doesn't affect the quality of life of these post-libertarians- it draws striking parallels to the city of Venice, which I had ruminated on in my posting Ah Venice!. . .is sinking? (February 20th, 2009)
It's the same basic concept- people seeking freedom above all- from politics, social norms, etc., and constructing a new society on er, water. And it hasn't been done for hundreds of thousands of years, not counting the people who live on houseboats. People build new sub-divisions all the time, but a new society?! I mean a brand-new society! Far out man.
A short history of other entrepreneurs who attempted to build their own freestanding societies is included in the article.
I do doubt that the occupants of this new society will feel the need to steal treasures from other cultures, like the Venetians did by stealing the horses during the Crusades, most probably from the Hippodrome in Constantinople, though their point of origin remains in dispute.
You have to hand it to the people who believe that this really can work. It's like the kids that really grew up to be the astronauts and firefighters that they said that they wanted to be.
Or like the incredibly poetic line from one of my favorite works, the Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster, one of society's overlooked philosophical tomes as it masquerades as a children's book,
"Now and then, though, someone does begin to grow differently. Instead of down, his feet grow up toward the sky. But we do our best to discourage awkward things like that."
"What happens to them?" insisted Milo.
"Oddly enough they often grow ten times the size of everyone else," said Alec thoughtfully. "and I've heard that they walk among the stars."
I attribute it to my mattress that is trying to kill me, rendering me with excruciating back pain (between the shoulder blades no less) that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy, if I had enemies. I say a life well lived is the best revenge.
Therefore, I decided to post a little something something so that come fall when I am at USC (yay my #1 choice !!!) people won't think that I'm a pretentious idiot who just says that she has a blog, which she hasn't touched since 2007- that's my other blog- youneedaninja.blogspot.com, which has, like 3 recipes on it and that's about it. I don't even remember which e-mail it's tied to.
I have been thinking a lot about this whole economy (and how we got here), new urbanism, and Detroit, all of which will merit their own postings. But I had to share this bizarre concept that I discovered in an article from Wired's February 2009 issue called, "Live Free or Drown"
http://www.wired.com/techbiz/startups/magazine/17-02/mf_seasteading
There is an entrepreneur named Patri Friedman who is the executive director of a non-profit called, the Seasteading Institute. The Seasteading Institute has big plans to start a new society on water. Yes, water. Mr. Friedman is a former software engineer who worked for Google, but wanted to pursue something much bigger. (in full disclosure I do process some health insurance claims at my current position for Google) Mr. Friedman is also the son of libertarian legal theorist David Friedman and grandson of free-market economist Milton Friedman, who won the Nobel Prize (facts from Chris Baker's article)
I'll spare you the political ideology behind this idea. Suffice to say it'll be both laissez-faire (let do, literally > let things take their natural course) and laissez bon temps roule (let the good times roll)
Wired covered this story, not only because it's unusual, but also because the concept is supposed to be like a platform in the same sense that Linux is a platform, which can expand and build upon itself. This is definitely out of my depth, but the author of the article, Chris Baker, does an excellent job explaining it. If you know anyone who's a tech nerd/sociologist this may intrigue them.
My dad, though I love him dearly, sometimes entertains rather "unusual" thoughts about separating from the government, libertarian ideals, etc., But this concept takes the cake, past the people in Montana who want to succeed from the U.S. (good luck with that. . .), past the hermits and the recluses, even the Unabomber seems "normal" to a relative degree. These people and their motivations are interesting, no doubt about it, but they are seriously out there, both literally and figuratively.
I did think, however, that though there is technically a definite absence of any need for planners- what will they need people to help plan make sure that the world's first floating Wal-mart doesn't affect the quality of life of these post-libertarians- it draws striking parallels to the city of Venice, which I had ruminated on in my posting Ah Venice!. . .is sinking? (February 20th, 2009)
It's the same basic concept- people seeking freedom above all- from politics, social norms, etc., and constructing a new society on er, water. And it hasn't been done for hundreds of thousands of years, not counting the people who live on houseboats. People build new sub-divisions all the time, but a new society?! I mean a brand-new society! Far out man.
A short history of other entrepreneurs who attempted to build their own freestanding societies is included in the article.
I do doubt that the occupants of this new society will feel the need to steal treasures from other cultures, like the Venetians did by stealing the horses during the Crusades, most probably from the Hippodrome in Constantinople, though their point of origin remains in dispute.
You have to hand it to the people who believe that this really can work. It's like the kids that really grew up to be the astronauts and firefighters that they said that they wanted to be.
Or like the incredibly poetic line from one of my favorite works, the Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster, one of society's overlooked philosophical tomes as it masquerades as a children's book,
"Now and then, though, someone does begin to grow differently. Instead of down, his feet grow up toward the sky. But we do our best to discourage awkward things like that."
"What happens to them?" insisted Milo.
"Oddly enough they often grow ten times the size of everyone else," said Alec thoughtfully. "and I've heard that they walk among the stars."
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Men of the World You Have Been Warned!
OK, as you all know, I try to keep this blog fairly academic. However, my friend at work sent this to me and after I picked myself up off the floor, having fallen out of my chair from laughing so hard I knew I needed to post this. Plus, I got into my school of choice- go Trojans!!! So I feel a little "safer" posting less than cerebral stuff every once in a while.
I also work on a computer all day and at the end of the day I don't want to be anywhere near a keyboard, but as my blog has been a little sparse these past few weeks I'll rectify that this weekend. In the meantime- enjoy!
NINE WORDS WOMEN USE -
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. (see #2)
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying Screw YOU!
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.
I also work on a computer all day and at the end of the day I don't want to be anywhere near a keyboard, but as my blog has been a little sparse these past few weeks I'll rectify that this weekend. In the meantime- enjoy!
NINE WORDS WOMEN USE -
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine. (see #2)
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying Screw YOU!
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.
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